I used to be so happy till i forgotten what pain is
A childish laughed so happily
Thinking nothing but a happy things
Do everything i want without knowing the consequences
Playing, running none stop till tired with friends
Got scolded by parents for troubling them too much
Never stop doing things that i like to do
Always run towards the big hills
Rolling on hills and traveling through the woods
A journey without knowing any fear
An smiling face that can never stopped laughing

A happy soul that used to be me
Me now
Who's broken so much
That 'happy moments' are nothing but painful moments
That 'happy family' that i used to living with are now faded into the dark abyss
Just like my soul
This dark soul
No one can understand
U don't need to understand it
Because this soul can never be saved
Because this soul will be burdening your life
So ignore this soul
This soul doesn't even worthy to be living

As i growing older and older
This mind are so 'matured' that childish things aren't fit for me
So matured that people's thought "What's the fucking wrong with her problem?" Right?
Or not
Doesn't matter because that's what i have always feel
So if i feel like that then it's right
If not how did i end up having that feelings

Childhood, do i even remember?
No, i don't haha
Aren't that pathetic
Now too i won't be remember
Future too i won't be remember
Because this 'BPD' which i'm suffering now
Since i was a victims of a ...
And now ... myself because of too much pain to 'just living...' " Are you okay?
I'm okay~
Of course, I'm not okay...! Such a foolish questions
If i said no it will just make you feel burden
I don't need your 'sympathy'
Nothing can save this soul
This soul can never be healed
Even i have tried many times
I failed
U failed
I don't blame anyone
Just blamed myself for living~