Locked

I can't entrust myself to anyone

Look, you don't see anything

The light shining down vanishing wither 

The things that i cant admit

My weakness

My past

even though i can get what i want

Surely the kindness, i'm holding onto with my hands, will disappear

My heart is locked

It is about to break to pieces

I keep in the tears

I laugh every day

My heart has shown me that there is no reason to trust

What killed me..

were those hypocrites

Even though I can get what I want

surely the kindness I'm holding will disappear

The common answer to living is that when you die, you will ll start all over again and move on

My heart is locked 

It's about to fall

I keep in this tears

I scream everyday

My heart left me the strength to trust that there is a reason 

What killed me..

Was my own very heart.

So now, I'm holding this pain

Like the day I abandoned everything

Everyday it hurts even more

But it doesnt matter anymore..

I dont know anymore.. i attempted suicide again but... haha.. i guess i feel guilty n afraid of god. Like... maybe i should let myself suffering than hurting god.. but if i'm broken again, everyday, every moment.. i wont tolerate anymore.. i'll just keep attempt suicide until i suffered n cannot bear n maybe die pls... tq bye